“You are SO focused”
For as long as I can remember, this is something I have heard over and over again from family, friends and even acquaintances.
I always took it as a compliment.
A source of pride in fact.
Until recently that is….
Over the last number of years, I have really started to question the source of my focus.
Specifically, I have begun wondering if I have spent the last 10 years focusing on the wrong things.
Not just wondering…..
Because I know the answer.
I just haven’t wanted to accept it.
Truth be told, I still don’t.
Except that I have found myself back in almost the EXACT same place I was 10 years ago.
Thinking about, and dreaming about virtually the EXACT same things I was thinking about and dreaming about 10 years ago.
How did this happen?
Although I didn’t see it then, I can see it clearly now.
I poured myself into an interest and convinced myself that it was a passion, so that I could rationalize my choices.
Over and over again, I chose to focus on what was SAFE, and on what was KNOWN, rather than take a risk.
Better to stick with what I know, and succeed, rather than follow my heart, and risk failure…..
At least that’s what I told myself.
Not in thoughts or words.
But through my actions.
Because it was easier.
There it is.
The brutal, honest truth.
And I’m finally at a place in my life, where I’m willing to acknowledge that.
And not just acknowledge it…..
……but actually do something about it.
Because I just don’t care any more.
I don’t care about what “other people” think.
I don’t care about whether I am loved by “the world”…..or hated….
Whether I am seen as successful….or insignificant….
Whether I am admired……..or ignored…..
Whether I am a “somebody,” or “nobody” at all……
I know that I am loved and accepted – unconditionally – by the people in my life that matter the most.
I know that I am fearfully and wonderfully made…..(Psalm 139:14)
I know that I have been blessed with a destiny and a purpose…..(Jeremiah 29:11)
And it is time to actively live out that purpose.
The purpose that has been whispering in my soul for as long as I can remember.
The purpose that is also my passion.
The passion that is ready to be spoken out loud.
Hello. My name is Andrea Walford, and I am an artist, a writer and a poet.
*The image is a photograph of an original piece of artwork and poem that I created.